Dreams do come true.

So evidently MySpace was down due to excessive heat. I can’t wait to hear someone bitch about this on their blog. If you know of anyone who actually complained about MySpace being down, please post the url in the comment section. I need to know who these people are.

Have you ever just sat down and smoked some numbers? Me either. Today I was watching some childrens programming and the new EXTREME Sesame Street was on. Not only did they tell you what the number was, but they smoked it after. Not like cigarettes, like full on hits you don’t see on tv. I don’t know where this country is going, but I definately don’t want children smoking numbers. Especially number 2’s.

Could you imagine if there was an Emo Stock Market? Like buying public shares of Emo Bands or Emo Scenesters. What a concept. I guess it would be good til it crashed. Then it would be great. All the Emo Kids would just off themselves.

Well, there are 278 designs for the highly anticipated “Snakes on a Plane release” on Cafe Press. I guess it’s going to be really awesome. I think it’s time to rate and review these soon to be collectors items.

1. First up is ye olde classic. Probably from somewhere in Ireland. Maybe.

“This shirt is like the time I cut my balls with a set of clippers only less satisfying.”

2. Snakes on a terrible rhyme and graphics.

“This made me want to shoot the heroin into my eyeball. After my testicles.”

3. What is so wrong with this shirt?

“This really sums up the Snakes on a Plane movement. Absolutely Gay.”

4. This one is for the innermost douchebag jock in you.

“Sorry, no free Dave Matthews CD’s with this one. No we don’t have any clues for sale.”

5. Holy shit I like the idea. Maybe.

“Some kind of Lady Byng or Honorable mention goes to them.”

6. Ok, seriously. Who let the damn hippies use the computer.

“The worst part is that these fucking hippies know how to use Photoshop. Are drugs really that expensive now?”

7. The last was the riddler. Not that like, it matters, but this was my balco dealer.

“Took me a minute, but I did eventually think I was brainually handicapped for reviewing these.”

Thank you society.

“Think about it. I know theres no moustache on the bag but there could be. Whats the difference between a LV and a Swazi? L and V instead of a sort of turned around pair of S’s. I can’t predict the future, but I know Louis Vuitton is the new Hitler. In a good way.”

–From Overheard in New York

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Riveting.

Someone evidently is a pervert.

Today I saw you on the street.
I thought you might be pretty cool.
Then I saw your Louis Vuitton bag.
Hey go fuck yourself you stupid bitch.

I’ve been obsessed with the new phone I got. It’s one of those awesome celeb phones. I was so psyched about it but unfortunately was a Keith Moon phone. It died on me.

Son of a bitch.

How could I not already know this? Had to verify.

CLICK IT BITCH!

Thanks be to god.