New York is so big I tell ya. Nothing like going out and doing a little people watching. Sometimes I go out and look at people and just cringe. The cringing slows down after a second or two and turns into curiousity. Curiousity of what the hell their parents might’ve looked like.

I swear to god that I think I saw Mr. Peanut out on the street the other day. I can’t be totally sure but I know he’s the only walking peanut i’ve seen in the past year. How can you mistake him really? Top hat, monocle, cane, no clothes, he’s a peanut. Take your pick what part is funny to you, but it’s funny no matter which one you choose.

I didn’t know what kind of thing could have spawned an individual like Mr. Peanut so I decided to take it upon myself to try and figure out his true origin. Along the way, I have imagined many scenarios, and this is the one I think actually happened.

On the set of Sesame Street, the number 8 decided to leave The Counts private dressing room since she felt violated by all the talk that 7 actually 8 9. 8 went out to clear her mind at a local coffee shop. While at the coffee shop 8 accidentally bumped into an older George Burns who just happened to be wearing a monocle at the time. They met and decided to go out to a show and see some old timey musical. After the musical they went home, ate peanuts, drank kirschwasser and listened to the little orphan annie radio show. They held each other and kissed once while George Burns prematurely ejaculated through his pants into 8’s 5 hole. 9 months later Mr. Peanut was born.

Seriously, where did that fucker come from?

This entry was posted on Thursday, October 25th, 2007 at 8:14 pm and is filed under Comedy, Funny Ideas, Im a Retard, Quick Laughs, WTF Stuff, bvllets. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.