I saw a jukebox that works on credit card swipes now. That’s gotta be the easiest thing to use a stolen credit card on. I’m gonna remember that next time I find a credit card I’m going there and charging thousands of dollars in credit to the machine. That’s gotta be so awesome to have your card stolen and then have a Four Thousand dollar charge for a jukebox on the card. It’s also gotta be the easiest thing to explain in case of fraud. Or legit I spose. Maybe I should do it with mine just for kicks. Be like,

Mastercard – “We appreciate your quick response to your credit card being stolen. We are here to serve you. It seems someone placed some large charges on your card last night including a large charge from an internet jukebox at TGI Friday’s. It was $4,000.”

Me - “You mean to tell me, someone played 8,000 songs on my dime at TGI Friday’s last night?” (Of course that’s where this god awful creation is.)

Mastercard – “That is correct Bvllets. It seems you or someone also played Eddie Money on an average of 40% of the time. Do you like Eddie Money?”

Me – “Well, me and Eddie have sort of this love-hate relationship, well; I guess I like him. Is still wasn’t me last night. Wow. 3,200 Eddie Money songs. Was anything else charged?”

Mastercard – “Seems you, or someone, bought a fully loaded Lamborghini Diablo, 2 tickets to a place listed as Paradise, and some charge for $3000 at the White Coffee Boutique. Was that you?”

Me – “(Shifts into 5th gear) *sniffle* Nope, not me. Must have been those guys at Friday’s. Hold on, I’m about to pass this poor person.”

Mastercard – “Is that 2 tickets to Paradise playing in the background? I thought you said you didn’t like Eddie Money.”

Me – “I said he’s ok and it’s on the radio. Are we done here? *sniffle*”

Mastercard – “I suppose this phone call is over but one of our specialists is going to contact you to investigate further.”

Me – “No worries, I will be on vacation with my girlfriend though. Let me give you my number in Paradise. It’s *sniffle* 305-423-4243.”

Mastercard – “Uhmmm.”

Me – “You’re breaking up. Have your investigator call me.”

Mastercard – “Thanks for using Mastercard. If there is anything we can do for you, please don’t hesitate to contact us.”

Me – “I’ll just use the card instead. Thanks.”

Mastercard – “I thought you said you didn’t have it.”

Me – “Like I said, we’re breaking up. *sniffle* Later.”

This entry was posted on Sunday, October 16th, 2005 at 9:47 pm and is filed under Comedy, Funny Ideas, Quick Laughs, Situational Humor, WTF Stuff, bvllets. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.